A few weeks ago in a blog post I mentioned that during a church service one night I came to a turning point. A decision, a place I needed to get to on my own where I felt God saying to me “How many times Bethany? How often will we go around about this.” At that moment it was like that was all I needed to hear, to decide to move on. To get over this hump and to realize just how often I HAD gone over this with God. To realize just how much time, energy, tears, and worry I HAD put into this space that the Lord was closing the door on.
As I have reflected on that these few weeks, I am just so aware of how much grace He has extended me during this process. And how patient He is. So patient. He’s given me so much space to process, to make the decision on my own. So much grace. He’s patient and gentle.
I’ve recently started Exodus with Calle while doing the Bible Recap plan and found myself like completely annoyed with Moses. Truly. I mean how many times do you think you need to remind God that you can’t speak, that you’ve got uncircumcised lips, that you’ve got this obstacle or that problem? You just can’t do it on your own. You need Aaron. What if they say this or that…? As if God didn’t know those things and still decided to choose you.
Then the Lord, is His lovely ironic way, threw that one back on my lap. Yeah tell me Bethany, how many times?!?
Here’s where I am going with this.
Moses couldn’t get over and see past what he viewed as limitations and weaknesses. The same limitations and weaknesses that God had created him with.
This gets me thinking about and back to the flexing and training with the Gym Owner from my previous post in this flex series. When we flex a muscle we are actually contracting our muscle because we’re creating tension that’s temporarily making the muscle fibers smaller or contracted. So, instead of moving weights, the muscle is being strengthened by holding still. Like in a holding pattern. A space or position that’s most likely uncomfortable.
Hi. I am here. LOL.
I keep envisioning myself doing a wall sit. Thighs burning, readjusting my back against the wall. Breathing hard, probably red and sweat on my brow.
Another use of the word flex is a slang term meaning “to show off,” whether it be your physique, your belongings, or some other thing you consider superior to those of others.
This team picture defines FLEX. 🙂
And THAT I think is why God gives us these weaknesses, these limitations. These disabilities and impairments because HE wants to simply show up and FLEX. God isn’t surprised by our weaknesses. He’s not embarrassed by them or disappointed in finding us imperfect. He created those in order that through those (and especially because our honest recognition of those) He may be made strong.
In our weakness, He is strong.
“Not by might, but by MY POWER,” says the Lord.
He wants to FLEX.
I need once again to shut down that inner critic saying to me “You are less then.” And turn up that Holy Spirit voice inside of me saying, “I have made you. I will carry you. I will sustain you and I will rescue you.” Isaiah 46:4
As soon as I can be again reminded of these truths, then somehow the struggle begins to shift. My perspective of my struggle can rise above the pain and uncomfortable position I find myself in. I begin to see purpose and truths in spite of the pain. I start looking for changes, for forward movement, for encouragement and the will to endure. I can dig in a little bit and begin to anticipate the pain with a renewed vision. Flexing helps bring blood to your muscles, really helping build them up. … Flexing also helps isolate the muscle you are training, to really work it.
The wall sit becomes worth the thigh pain, because there is a greater purpose to this pain. The strengthening of my core, my muscles and my body is worth this momentary pain especially when I know that the trainer has my best interests, the full picture in mind.
My willingness to work on the muscles He’s showing need developed, is part of the training. Without that recognition they just keep being excuses.
Reasons I can’t.
Discarded dreams and unfulfilled missions and purpose.
Stand ins doing the work He’s called me to do.
When I choose to sit in it. Stay in the uncomfortable. Work with Him in the time I spend with Him. Take seriously the words He says to me. Put in the effort to pray and learn then …
My flex can become His FLEX.